Post by spastic bard on Apr 26, 2008 22:01:32 GMT -5
So I finished this awhile back... But decided to wait until now and post it. I need to fix a few things, and I hate emo-Lorelai. Vanir is a bad influence. This takes place after the first game right after a conversation Kevin and I rped. Not sure what happens to her besides how she dies... Which is morbid. Anyway... Title is taken from a Sting song (Why Should I Cry for You?), which has joined the ranks with Nightwish's "Nemo" as my Lorelai-songs.
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The echoing call of the seagulls made her realize just how alone she really was. Few lights could be seen from her position at the edge of the dock, and besides the stars, nothing gave light to the quiet waves moving around her. There was a chill to the breeze, but otherwise the salty spray of the ocean felt distant. Or maybe it was that she felt removed. She wasn’t sure anymore.
Lorelai sat quietly, her legs hanging over the edge of the dock. For some reason she had decided not to take her heavy cloak with her, so all she wore was the loose white blouse, with an elegantly decorated bodice and long brown skirt. Her long hair was messily plaited over one shoulder. She should have been able to feel the breeze with ease. She did feel cold, but she wasn’t sure if that was the air or the events of the night replaying in her mind. Nervously she gripped the end of her braid with her bare hands.
Life had been sort of quiet and detached recently. After everything that had happened, it seemed odd to be acting as a normal person, with a normal life and a normal occupation. Normal was not something Lorelai was used to. She was pretty sure the numb feeling was not normal, but that was something she had felt as soon as she stepped foot on the island. Never before had she imagined a place where magic was not in every step and breath. Not until she had come across the Chosen and their ability to purge… The memory still made her shudder a little.
Without magic life had changed drastically. Lorelai wasn’t sure how much of that change was good. Her constant fear in life was gone as long as she remained here, but by remaining here part of her felt dead. She couldn’t control water, or the storm winds. She couldn’t heal the smallest of cuts or perform the simplest illusion. Even her connection to Mika was weak and faint compared to what they used to have. Sometimes Lorelai was convinced more of her was dying along with her magic side, but logic told her that was an exaggeration. Things had changed, but she was still healthy and alive.
She could no longer hear the ocean the same way she used to, though. She could no longer read people’s emotions or understand her own. Maybe if she had she wouldn’t be in such a state right now. Lorelai pulled her legs up and tightened her knees to her chest. She wrapped both arms around them and hugged herself close. Maybe if she had her magic she wouldn’t have been such a coward to the one person that deserved her best. She would have seen this coming and would have been better prepared… For what exactly?
Lorelai had returned home after she finished her cleaning for the night at the tavern. She had hoped Vanir would be asleep before she came in so she wouldn’t have to face him so quickly. That hope had been in vain, but he acted as if he hadn’t said a word about how he felt or the fact that she avoided answering. Everything was completely normal.
Only it wasn’t. Lorelai felt more cut off than ever. She stayed up reading until Vanir had fallen asleep, and then slipped out to walk down to the water’s edge. It was an old defense of hers, but tonight she found little comfort in the action. The water no longer had answers for her. As long as she was on this island she was deaf, mute, and practically blind. It was frustrating, but never more so than tonight. She needed an answer more than ever.
Lorelai knew she cared about Vanir. She had made him family along with Maura. At first she wasn’t sure why she had felt protective over him, but as time went on she found it didn’t matter. Despite his moments of insecurity and sometimes near stupidity, Vanir proved to be a good friend. She felt a connection to him, and it wasn’t just because of their similar age. It wasn’t until his terrible nightmare spell aboard the Siren that she realized the other part of it.
Vanir never filled the role of younger brother to her. That label had never crossed her mind. Yet having him comatose for days opened an old wound she had long learned to ignore. It created a connection between her new family and her old family, and more specifically a connection between Vanir and her younger brother. That connection disturbed her quite a bit.
After that, the connection vanished again. Lorelai blamed it on the Solstice snowball fight. Vanir became Vanir again, not a bizarre twin of her dead sibling. It gave her peace, but it certainly was not forgotten. So when Vanir confessed about how he felt towards her… She reacted badly.
Lorelai sighed quietly and buried her head in her arms. Vanir probably thought the worst after they had finished talking. She said she needed time to think. Knowing him he took it as a rejection. It was, in a sense… And yet it wasn’t. Lorelai had never given thought to where Vanir stood in that area. She never had to since he and Maura were so close. A romantic relationship had never crossed her mind. On principle Lorelai avoided that type of connection. Mainly because she had never had one and it hadn’t been the time to start. Not with the whole going insane thing looming around her at every corner.
She couldn’t deny that the two of them had gotten much closer recently. Vanir and her had spent months traveling together on the Siren. They were living and working together now. They had plans to go find her island and take care of it, just like they were doing now on his. He was the only family she had left.
And yet somehow she avoided the idea of romantic notions completely. It had never occurred to her that Vanir might care for her on that level. Did she feel the same way?
The waves pushed against the dock piers, but gave no answer. She had no answer. She had no idea where to go from here. Why did life go and get so complicated when it seemed so deceivingly simple? With a sigh, Lorelai stood up. She gave the ocean one last look before she turned and started back towards the town.
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The echoing call of the seagulls made her realize just how alone she really was. Few lights could be seen from her position at the edge of the dock, and besides the stars, nothing gave light to the quiet waves moving around her. There was a chill to the breeze, but otherwise the salty spray of the ocean felt distant. Or maybe it was that she felt removed. She wasn’t sure anymore.
Lorelai sat quietly, her legs hanging over the edge of the dock. For some reason she had decided not to take her heavy cloak with her, so all she wore was the loose white blouse, with an elegantly decorated bodice and long brown skirt. Her long hair was messily plaited over one shoulder. She should have been able to feel the breeze with ease. She did feel cold, but she wasn’t sure if that was the air or the events of the night replaying in her mind. Nervously she gripped the end of her braid with her bare hands.
Life had been sort of quiet and detached recently. After everything that had happened, it seemed odd to be acting as a normal person, with a normal life and a normal occupation. Normal was not something Lorelai was used to. She was pretty sure the numb feeling was not normal, but that was something she had felt as soon as she stepped foot on the island. Never before had she imagined a place where magic was not in every step and breath. Not until she had come across the Chosen and their ability to purge… The memory still made her shudder a little.
Without magic life had changed drastically. Lorelai wasn’t sure how much of that change was good. Her constant fear in life was gone as long as she remained here, but by remaining here part of her felt dead. She couldn’t control water, or the storm winds. She couldn’t heal the smallest of cuts or perform the simplest illusion. Even her connection to Mika was weak and faint compared to what they used to have. Sometimes Lorelai was convinced more of her was dying along with her magic side, but logic told her that was an exaggeration. Things had changed, but she was still healthy and alive.
She could no longer hear the ocean the same way she used to, though. She could no longer read people’s emotions or understand her own. Maybe if she had she wouldn’t be in such a state right now. Lorelai pulled her legs up and tightened her knees to her chest. She wrapped both arms around them and hugged herself close. Maybe if she had her magic she wouldn’t have been such a coward to the one person that deserved her best. She would have seen this coming and would have been better prepared… For what exactly?
Lorelai had returned home after she finished her cleaning for the night at the tavern. She had hoped Vanir would be asleep before she came in so she wouldn’t have to face him so quickly. That hope had been in vain, but he acted as if he hadn’t said a word about how he felt or the fact that she avoided answering. Everything was completely normal.
Only it wasn’t. Lorelai felt more cut off than ever. She stayed up reading until Vanir had fallen asleep, and then slipped out to walk down to the water’s edge. It was an old defense of hers, but tonight she found little comfort in the action. The water no longer had answers for her. As long as she was on this island she was deaf, mute, and practically blind. It was frustrating, but never more so than tonight. She needed an answer more than ever.
Lorelai knew she cared about Vanir. She had made him family along with Maura. At first she wasn’t sure why she had felt protective over him, but as time went on she found it didn’t matter. Despite his moments of insecurity and sometimes near stupidity, Vanir proved to be a good friend. She felt a connection to him, and it wasn’t just because of their similar age. It wasn’t until his terrible nightmare spell aboard the Siren that she realized the other part of it.
Vanir never filled the role of younger brother to her. That label had never crossed her mind. Yet having him comatose for days opened an old wound she had long learned to ignore. It created a connection between her new family and her old family, and more specifically a connection between Vanir and her younger brother. That connection disturbed her quite a bit.
After that, the connection vanished again. Lorelai blamed it on the Solstice snowball fight. Vanir became Vanir again, not a bizarre twin of her dead sibling. It gave her peace, but it certainly was not forgotten. So when Vanir confessed about how he felt towards her… She reacted badly.
Lorelai sighed quietly and buried her head in her arms. Vanir probably thought the worst after they had finished talking. She said she needed time to think. Knowing him he took it as a rejection. It was, in a sense… And yet it wasn’t. Lorelai had never given thought to where Vanir stood in that area. She never had to since he and Maura were so close. A romantic relationship had never crossed her mind. On principle Lorelai avoided that type of connection. Mainly because she had never had one and it hadn’t been the time to start. Not with the whole going insane thing looming around her at every corner.
She couldn’t deny that the two of them had gotten much closer recently. Vanir and her had spent months traveling together on the Siren. They were living and working together now. They had plans to go find her island and take care of it, just like they were doing now on his. He was the only family she had left.
And yet somehow she avoided the idea of romantic notions completely. It had never occurred to her that Vanir might care for her on that level. Did she feel the same way?
The waves pushed against the dock piers, but gave no answer. She had no answer. She had no idea where to go from here. Why did life go and get so complicated when it seemed so deceivingly simple? With a sigh, Lorelai stood up. She gave the ocean one last look before she turned and started back towards the town.